Taking kids to church is hard.

Taking a sensory-sensitive kid to church is no exception. The music and echoes are just so overwhelming. Not to mention the big statues and crowd of people. We had tried the family room -- the speaker was louder than the main area! It was crowded and messy and not comfortable. So we resigned ourselves to limiting his attendance to the main holidays when we HAD to go as a family, but hubby had to go out with him almost right away. We were anxious parents. No one wants to make a scene in church. It was just a hard situation.

I confess-- it was a battle I had stopped fighting. For the sake of our family sanity, I have been just going by myself. It was just less stressful that way. I need church to fill me up for the week and a whole ordeal with an overwhelmed child was not cup-filling. I just tried to bring enough grace home each week for the whole family.

A visiting family member recently asked why I don't take him with me. "It's complicated," I said.

But I know that was a prompting. I had even recently given encouragement to another person in a similar situation about bringing their special-needs child to church. It is funny how sometimes we resist taking our own advice even if we hand it out so easily.

I used to go to church and sit with my Grandma. Some of the most tender memories I have of my grandma were from sitting next to her holding her hand in church. She'd give me a piece of candy -- Werther's -- during the sermon which I thought was so special, but realize now was so I would stay quiet, lol. At this past Sunday's mass I witnessed a young girl and her Grandma and memories came flooding back to me. The closing hymn was also her favorite hymn. Another prompting.

Last night there was an evening healing mass and I am so in awe of that and I wanted to be there. It was at a time of day where I wouldn't easily be able to do a handoff to hubby to watch my son and I felt called to try anyway.

He did so great being quiet. Since it was the "daily mass" format, there was no singing and he commented that he was okay with it because there was no singing. When the priest sang the Alleluia he said "when will he be done singing?" lol. He had an iPad and sat on my lap and kept himself as calm as he could which I know was a gift from God. He was starting to get restless after the homily and I said "this is the important part coming up: when they turn that bread and wine into Jesus" You guys! You should have seen the wonder in his eyes. He sure did pay attention. And when they rang the bells I told him, "It's becoming Jesus." He focused right in on that trying to get that wonderful mystery figured out, along with the rest of us. ❤️

He started getting wiggly; there's a lot of up and down and crowd responses during this point in the Mass. Then we started the Lord's prayer and I just watched this peace come over him as he began to recognize the familiar words and he beamed as he told me "Mama this is OUR prayer!"

We were probably disruptive with our whispering and his game music (which we negotiated to keep at level 1 so he could still hear it). He didn't sit perfectly and politely next to me and rise and fall with the motions of the crowd the way I see other 5 year-olds do in Sunday Mass. It was not perfect from the outside, but to me, it was perfect. He received the wonder and grace and joy of the presence of the Eucharist--probably to a greater extent that night than most of the parishioners who habitually do the motions. He gained confidence in his ability to handle an unfamiliar and uncomfortable situation. And so did I.

Not sure if you're the same as me but I get caught thinking it has to be a certain way. That people think something about me. That if I can't do it the RIGHT WAY, then I should be ashamed, or that I shouldn't try because we don't fit.

But the truth is, Jesus is for everyone. I know this but sometimes I get tricked into not believing that to be true for my circumstances. The readings yesterday and today happen to be about children, the faith of a child. Of course they were! Because Jesus wanted us there! He wanted us to receive the gifts that He had waiting for us last night.

There is no shame in bringing children to church. It is hard, no matter what, but it is so good. It is so important. I have a renewed courage to make this a priority. It's definitely not Jesus who makes us feel shame or embarrassment or fear about our children's behavior in church-- it is the enemy. Even though I know the scriptures and know that we will receive grace, it can just feel so heavy and hard to fight that spiritual battle. But He makes a way for us if we seek it. I am so grateful that way was made for us last night and that I could tell you about it so that I may encourage others of you who can identify with this. Tuesday night mass might just be our new routine. See you there?

I am so thankful for this journey. I’ve been doing this now for almost 2 years and what I’ve learned is that people get into oils for many different reasons:
🧒🏽 Kids
😴 Sleep
🤧 To avoid days off from work and school 🤒
☠️ To get toxins out of the home 🕯🧼
😌 To help provide support for a specific thing they or a loved one is dealing with.
😖 Stress

It is a beautiful thing to watch people go from addressing a couple of things in daily life to finding a deeper level of overall wellness in body and mind:  myself included!

I got into oils for sleep. I had a 3 year old and we were struggling. What I quickly found was that I was able to climb out from the dark place I was in and find so much hope and light and freedom from so many things I had been carrying by tuning into my emotional wellness and the capabilities that essential oils have to offer.

The body and mind and soul are inextricably connected and I’ve learned so many things about the link between emotions and wellness.

I wouldn’t be where I am today without YL oils, Jesus, the tenacity in making the changes I needed to make to allow myself to let go of what wasn’t serving me, and this community and all of the resources that come along with it.

As a result of my life-changing experiences I have a passion is about emotional wellness, emotional release the body/mind/soul connection, and the healing power of Christ. I believe we cannot fully be well without balancing all of those things.
I have amassed a ton of knowledge on the subject and I am just leaning into where it will lead me next.

I recorded this video on Facebook to share my heart and gratitude for how far I've come, and rather than typing it all out, I just wanted to share with you here too.

Resources and more info:
​Warning: Parenting a Gifted Child May Be Hazardous to your (Mental) Health Grayson School

It’s not just in your head: Self-care for moms of gifted children Not So Formulaic

A few posts ago I was referring to my word in 2018.  It was actually a couple of words - "Calm Confidence"

I was working on my vision board for myself, my family, and my business and while I was making my lists, it hit me what my word should be this year.

Unencumbered.

Right. I had to laugh.  You know you're on the right path when it doesn't seem like you would have chose it if you were really calling the shots. haha.  I mean what a dork,  I coudn't just settle for "freedom" or "unburdened" or "liberated" or something less nerdy?  I even negotiated with myself that it should be "light"  instead.  And that is definitely the runner up. Or it might be the one that I actually tell people lol so that I don't feel like such a weiner for my dramatic word choice.

Our team is making a necklace with our word.  I mean I have to put that on jewelry?

But,  the spirit was clear.  That is the one.

unencumbered
adjective

1. not impeded, slowed down, or retarded; free to move, advance, or go forward.
2. having few or no burdens or obligations.
3. not burdened or weighed down, as with bulky or heavy objects.

It's so right.  I get in my own way so often.  I let other things get in my way.  I walk heavy. 

So, this year, I am going to travel light. I am going to ditch excuses. I am going to just do the dang thing. I am allowed to enjoy the process. I am allowed to let life flow to me. I am allowed to move forward!

i am light,
i am free
i advance with ease

What's your word for 2019?

Last January I had a bug in my bonnet that I was going to make some changes.  I was going to get active,  I was going to get control of my anxiety,  and I was going to surrender to God and start to tune in to where he was really leading me.

I started Monique McLean's 21 Days of Prayer on January 2 last year.  It is so good. Although i have to admit I have to watch it on 1.5x speed because she is a bit wordy and I need to keep things moving.  I also have to admit it took me more than 21 days. But it was very very transformative for me. I also did the Feelings Protocol at the same time for the month of January and I have to say that they were perfect compliments to each other.

I am starting it again this January and I want to invite you to join me.  We don't have to start on exactly the same day or compare notes if you don't want to (but if you do, I'd be delighted to,  that's my passion!)  I think it is such a wonderful way to start the new year.

Since last year she's jazzed up the setup and it's really nice, over at youinfuse.com.  I get nothing for sending you over there but I highly recommend it for your own growth! There's also a workbook that I purchased to go with it this year, but it is not a requirement to do the study.  Go, check it out.  I'll wait here.

Drop me a message if you're planning to do it! I'd love to cheer you on in my prayers. 

Have a blessed Christmas and I am sending you all the best for  your best year yet in 2019.

xox
L

Last December I got myself this gift. It’s in my bathroom and I look at it every day. Last December I did not have any self-worth or courage. I was riddled with anxiety. I was sort of a loose cannon. I had literally just felt the call to start my business and was being swept up with a current of momentum in my soul that wasn’t going to heed my mind’s protests or hesitation with this plan laid out before me. So, in the business, we went through the exercise of picking a word for 2018 and I chose “calm confidence” because I had seen that phrase used to describe Sacred Mountain, (which had made me “get” what oils were all about) and I knew I’d need lots of it this year.
What a year it has been. In the beginning I was faking the confidence part, and lacking on the calm. In the middle I realized my word should be humility. I had started the year trying to compensate for where I lacked, but I had over-corrected. The difference between artificial growth and authentic growth is humility.
I faced some big scary self-development truths this year. I experienced unbelievable healing on several fronts, and it was all by the grace of a God who was going before me, leading me on a yoke through hills and valleys, giving me rest, giving me challenges, giving me blessings in the form of people and support and angels to guide me towards unprecedented growth.
I am just where I am meant to be. I just keep saying yes to the next step, and hanging on through the next lesson, and allow myself to be molded and formed for a greater purpose. And somewhere along the way when I wasn’t looking for it, that calm confidence did show up. 🙌

I'm thinking hard about my new word for 2019.  I know that setting intentions is very powerful and I am full of faith that this journey will continue to lead me to new opportunities, new heights, and new challenges for the glory of God!

What's your word for 2019??

Do you feel in touch with your dreams and the things you are called to do in this life?

If you’re feeling a little stuck or uninspired, try these things.

1. Get quiet. Spend some time meditating and envisioning what your future looks like and listen for divine inspiration.
2. Examine your strengths and gifts. Those are the breadcrumbs to finding our paths.
3. Focus on any beliefs you have that are limiting your ability to dream. Do you feel worthy of good things in your future? Do you have thoughts about what is available to you that cast a narrow boundary on your options? What can you do to invest in expanding your view to accept that life is for you, not against you? Spend some time thinking about ways you’ve been limiting yourself and work to expand your perspective.
4. Focus on how you want to feel, or how you might impact others, rather than material things. Our soul craves meaning which is deeper than material objects and we are more likely to achieve big things if we have altruistic visions in mind.

Widen Your Scope
God created you (and every person on planet Earth) with several parts. Like a pie with separate pieces, each part is critical to who you are; and all of these parts must be considered when you set goals.

Spiritual
Family
Social
Physical
Work
Health & Wellness
Start thinking about what you hope these areas will look like 3-6 months from now.

Importance of Affirmations
For those of you who aren’t familiar with the benefits of positive affirmations, I’d like to explain a little about them. An affirmation is really anything you say or think. A lot of what we normally say and think is quite negative and doesn’t create good experiences for us. We have to retrain our thinking and speaking into positive patterns if we want to change our lives.
An affirmation opens the door. It’s a beginning point on the path to change. In essence, you’re saying to your subconscious mind: “I am taking responsibility. I am aware that there is something I can do to change.” When I talk about doing affirmations, I mean consciously choosing words that will either help eliminate something from your life or help create something new in your life.

Louise Hay is the queen of affirmations and she has a ton of really good ones here. Look at her examples and choose 2-3 of them or write your own that you can put on your vision board.

Why Vision Boards Work
What we focus on expands. When you create a vision board and place it in a space where you see it often, you essentially end up doing short visualization exercises throughout the day. Visualization is one of the most powerful mind exercises you can do.

Our brains love pictures and we unconsciously work to achieve whatever messages we tell ourselves most.
So, what's the big secret to creating a vision board that works? It's simple: Your vision board should focus on how you want to feel, not just on things that you want. Don't get me wrong, it's great to include the material stuff, too. However, the more your board focuses on how you want to feel, the more it will come to life.

It doesn't have to be perfectly pretty or curated. Put thoughts and pictures that you want to bring into focus regularly.  Don't go overboard.  I think 3-5 themes is a sweet spot.

Ever get into a funk where you feel pretty lonely,  unloved, or just down?  I tend to have a few of these days every month, where it feels like no one is there for me and I am so weak and I crave connection and love to "fix me."
Lies.
When I am in the middle of it, it certainly doesn't feel like a lie.  I am convinced that everyone is selfish and doesn't care about me, and isn't tuned in to what I need.  I fixate on all the things that aren't happening, or aren't there.  Where I have fallen short,  where others have fallen short.  But.  Reality Check:  We are all imperfect beings in an imperfect world and nearly no one is purposely shafting anyone, especially in the love department. 
I have wounds from the past which make me vulnerable to fall into the pit of feeling unloved.  It's a program that my subconscious wrote a long time ago when I was in a situation that I didn't have the resources to navigate and so the pattern and the script I repeated was "I am not worthy of love", as a (flawed) logical deduction from the situation at hand.  The true reality of the situation was much more complicated than that and I've since learned that it actually had very little to do with me, and certainly nothing to do with my worthiness of love.  But,  those programs take a lot of effort to deconstruct!  In moments of weakness it is second nature to jump to them like a well-worn path that feels familiar and ironically comforting, if not also miserable.  It takes vigilance to wake up from the automatic execution of these patterns and stop them from barreling forward into a pit of self-deprecation.
We all have wounds from some thing or another from the past that are connected to lies that we repeat to ourselves.  These things can pop up in present day in odd places, in the midst of healthy relationships: a re-enactment of old footage in present day.  Our subconscious doesn't like to let go of wounds,  it likes to keep playing with them until they get resolved, aka proven to be false and replaced with a new reel of truth. 
You can recognize a wound if you get angry or upset about something someone did and the feelings overtake you.  Unless the thing that they did is enough to create its own new wound, it is probably a replay of a past wound that was triggered by something similar in the current situation.  If you're able to take some quiet time to explore your reaction, you might find the theme and be able to link it back to the original wound. 
To move past it,  you need to retrace the wound, release unresolved feelings and work to find peace with it. This doesn't happen magically all at once, but each time the wound is triggered you'll have a new opportunity to call it out and work to replace it with truth. 
The real truth, applicable to heal EVERY wound is that you are a child of God who is loved fiercely, unconditionally, and immensely and is wholly worthy of every bit of it.  There is nothing you can do,  or fail to do, that could ever reduce, remove, or even earn the love available to you every moment from the Father.  We all are loved with this same love.  No matter what.  And it is available for us to share, and heal, and live joyfully within, without limits.

Our subconscious loves images.  We have to work to engage our imagination to help create a new movie reel of good thoughts to overwrite the wounded images.

List all the people that love you.
Sit down and put pen to paper and think about all the people in your life who love you, care for you,  support you,  or would not wish ill of you.  This is evidence that you are good. You are loveable.  You are loved.

Fill your space with love.
Sit quietly and imagine all of the love on your list filling the room with you in it.  Magnify it. It could burst open the walls.  It fills all your cells, it rains down on you.  This is God's love.  It is even more immense than that.  You are so loved by God that there is literally nothing else you need.  

Loving Kindness
Now practice loving-kindness to yourself and imagine that love filling in your wound and healing it.  Imagine that love overflowing to the source of the wound and onto any person or thing that was involved.  You are safe.  You are loved.  You are healthy and strong. You are free from suffering.  You live with peace, joy, happiness, and ease. (you can google Loving Kindness Meditation to go deeper here).

Gratitude
Now list out all of the things you are grateful for, especially surrounding the person or event by which you've been triggered. Look to find the good intentions.  Attempt to see the situation from a higher perspective where they were not intending to hurt you, but managing their own situation the best they could. Finding things to be grateful for will help melt away those grievances you might still be holding on to. 

Freedom
Imagine your life free of this wound. Imagine your relationships without complication.  Imagine your life full of love. What does it feel like, smell like, taste like, sound like? Remember memories from the past that are filled with love.  Think about ways in the future you can fill your days with love. This sets the law of attraction in motion.  Your subconscious will work to create a life that matches your dreams.